I apologize again to anyone who is still waiting for me to make something. I can't seem to get better. It just keeps going on and I'm losing the will to even fight anymore. I swallow my meds every morning and every night and still no better. My Dr. keeps changing things around and I get a modicum of hope that this time it will work. It still hasn't. We only have two weeks until our trip to Amsterdam and I don't think I can make it. I can't even email the gallery about when my work will arrive for them. I am writing this because I felt like you all needed to know that I'm still not well. Hard for me to say that I'm sick. No wounds, no stitches, no bits of metal holding bones together. But I feel like I should. I still have days that I'm a walking zombie, unable to speak. Other days I get unjustifiably angry at everyone and everything. Other days I'm just numb enough to not care one way or another. Ed has been taking care of everything including me. He's been wonderful but there are days that I push him away. I'm sure he can't stand it much longer either. I have an appointment with one of the top ten phsychiatrists in the country in Philadelphia on June 9th. My Dr. knows him and says he may come up with something he hasn't thought of yet to help me. It's a seven hour evaluation. I can't imagine what that will be like. I can barely endure a trip to the supermarket.

So no need for anyone to feel sorry for me because, honestly it won't get through this thick black wall that's suffocating me. I just hope that I still have some fans left when this is over to be able to work for. Sorry for being such a downer.